bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize
