absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
Randomize
