11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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