I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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