He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
then he tried to convert me to islam
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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