Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I have post one night stand depression
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
