I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Randomize
