Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
