i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize
