The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
