Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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