i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize