Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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