What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize
