I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize