Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
There r osticjed everywhere
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Randomize
