I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
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