Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize
