This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
