Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Randomize
