Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Randomize
