It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
