wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
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