Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
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