Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
where am i from again
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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