Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
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