hotel room ftw
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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