look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
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