so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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