In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Randomize
