I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
