She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize