Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
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