Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
