How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Hey
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GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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