i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
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