Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
