I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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