So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Randomize
