Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
please don't ironically join a cult
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