I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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