I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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