I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
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