I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
