His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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