Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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