Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
