I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
