what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize
