new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
