yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Randomize
