Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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